Where Was God?

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For those of you who don’t know, I lost one of my very best friends in a motorcycle accident last Friday morning, one week ago exactly.  Even though we hadn’t gotten close until this past summer, Tyler changed my life.  Without him, I wouldn’t even come close to the person I am now.  But I mean, I feel like everyone who knew Tyler would say that, whether meaning it truthfully or not.

But that’s not why I’m writing this. I could go on for hours about who Tyler was to me and why he mattered so much. Why he’s the last person I think ever deserved to die so soon and why everyone is devastated by what happened.  They always say good people die young, and in this situation, it’s so true.  Is it tragic? Yes. But am I surprised? Not in the slightest.  Good people, like Tyler, die so soon because they figure it out so much faster than everyone else.  They finish the job God sent them down for and get to go back up to Heaven.  Sometimes it takes people 80 or 90 years to find out why they’re here, but not Tyler. Tyler knows the plan now and he’s up there with God watching over us all.  And as crazy as it sounds, I feel like he knew about it all along.  Not exactly when and where he was going to die, but how it was going to happen.  And really, over the past week that’s been one of my biggest comforts.  He would always look at me so confident when he would say, “If I die on my bike, it really just means that God wanted me dead, he wanted me up there!” And he would smile at me and point up to the sky.  Well, with logic like that, I couldn’t really argue with him.  He knew, he had it all figured out.

At his funeral service the other day, the question was brought up about where God was in the moment Tyler’s heart stopped.  When I first heard this, I had to take a moment because I thought it was SUCH a stupid question!  After thousands of conversations about everything surrounding religion with Tyler, I just felt like everyone close to him should know that answer.  Where was God?  He was RIGHT there.  As soon as Tyler’s body hit that minivan, it stopped moving.  He stopped moving, feeling, breathing, everything.  His body may have stopped, but his soul?  Not at all.  His soul flew, straight into God’s open arms, ready to get carried home.  God has a plan for everything, and His plan for Tyler involved coming home sooner than we all thought was necessary.  He may not have made it long down here on Earth, but that’s because he really didn’t need any longer.  In his 19 years here, he lived more than a lot of us every will be able to.  I don’t know how, but Tyler figured it out.  And I am so proud of him for that.

I continue to miss him more every day, but I think that’s just because I miss talking to him and seeing him laugh.  Watching how easy it was for him to connect to a complete stranger and how he smelled when I got to give him a hug. Even though these are completely valid reasons to miss someone, they’re also a little selfish.  If I could bring Tyler back, I wouldn’t. I know he’s in a better place and someday, I hope I’ll be able to hang out with him up there too.

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9 thoughts on “Where Was God?

  1. Sweet friend you really get it. Tyler isn’t lost he’s fully alive with Jesus. When I lost my daughter at 15 I was devastated and then I asked “what would they want me to do” and “how could I honor their life on earth”. For me the answers were in her life. The answers for moving forward without this amazing young man are in the way he lived his life. I believe Tyler would want everyone to know the One who gave him peace and hope about dying. There’s a reason he didn’t fear dying and that’s because he was sure of his next journey. Tyler has finished his earthly race and received his eternal prize but Tyler’s torch should be kept lit. There’s a dark world that needs you all. Hebrews 12:1-3…Read that and pay close attention to the first few words. Can’t you see Tyler up there fist pumping for you as you finish this race strong.

    As Christians we don’t grieve as those who have no hope. We don’t have to say “goodbye” because we know it’s “see you later”. See you later Tyler.

  2. That was a beautiful sentiment. How amazing to choose to just trust God, and love, and to remember Tyler.
    Let go and let God, comes to mind when I read this.
    It’s also wonderful that you have made a big step in your grief, which is giving Tyler permission to pass on. That is so important.
    We continue to lift all of those who loved Tyler, in prayer. May you find God’s abundant love and peace sufficient .
    Blessings to you!

  3. Beautiful, Tyler was an awesome young man. We just wanted him for more hugs. Thank you Amanda for the awesome job she did raising such an inspirational son.

  4. Thank you so much for the wonderful blog. What a good friend you’ve been to Tyler and your words have reconfirmed what I already knew but brought comfort in a dark night. Love you

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